Deadly Love

By David Dunatov

Narrator:  HERE I AM!!!! Yup…….   Oooooook, -=pst=- what are my lines?

Author:  AYE!  I’ll do it…  It seems that Sephy, again, is up to no good!  Lets see what happens…….

(At Tifa’s Bar)

Tifa:  Here you go Marline, another vodka….

Marline:  wwwwwww -=BURP=- wwwwith llllllemon

Barret:  Shit, she even drinks more then me!

Cloud:  Hey, I just found out Sephy is up to no good!

Everyone: NO DUH!

Cloud:  Anyway, I think its time that we investigate!

Cid:  We are not goin in the Highwind…

Cloud: Why?

Cid:  Just gave it a nice paint job at the shop.  It only costed 36,258,920 gil.

Cloud: Only?

Cid:  Well, not including tip!

Cloud:  Anyway, we don’t need to use the highwind or that friggin messed up buggy!!!!

Tifa:  What will we ride then?

Barret:  -=whisper whisper=- you… LOL!!!

Cid:  HA HA HA!!!

Tifa: -=bends down=- Whats so fun?

All the men:   (  .  )     (   .  )

                                 \/

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Tifa:  Oopsy, my pants fell off again!

Everyone:  !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tifa:  Darn, they fell off even more!

Barret:  uh, I got to jack off, uh, no, I mean go, yeah, go, right

Tifa:  ok

Cloud:  Uh yeah, me too, uh, *pant pant*

Tifa:  Damb, there goes my shirt!

Barret and Cloud:  YOU KNOW WHAT, WE ,CAN STAY A LITTLE LONGER!

Tifa:  Oh pooh, not my panties, why do I have a sudden erge to hump a bear?

Narrator:  Um, well, anyway, oh my god………………

Author:  Shit………………….

David:  J

(Much later at the crater)

Cloud:  Damb, wheres Sephy, I don’t have time to kill him all the time!

RedXIII:  Why did Barret stay at the bar and lock himself in the bathroom?

Cloud:  Don’t ask!

Aeris:  Look, there he is!

Sephy:  *saying to himself* Oh shit she’s hot, oh god, sudden erge to hump a bear!

Cloud:  SEPHY, WE COME TO KILL YOU!!!!

Aeris:  What are those pictures in his han.. HEY, that’s me dressing…..

Sephy:  She fine!

Cloud: J

Aeris:  CLOUD, STOP THAT AND KILL HIM NOW!

Sephy:  I love you aeris, don’t deny it!

Aeris:  Then that’s why you killed ME?

Sephy:  So, it’s a ….. Deadly love!

Cloud:  THERE IS ONLY ONE PERSON WHO GETS THEIR BOOTY AND THAT’S ME!!!!!

Aeris: CLOUD!

Cloud:  Hey, its true!!!

Sephy:  Fine, a duel!

Cloud:  OMNISLASH

Sephy:  Friggin cheater…….   AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(SLICE SLICE SLICE POW)

Sephy:  Ouchy!

Cloud:  There you go…

Sephy:  Major bear humping ouchies!

Aeris:  A job well done… uh, stop looking at me cloud….

Cloud:  ;)

Aeris:  Whatever……

Cloud:   Before we screw like bears humping in a tree, were is Barret?

(Back at the Bar)

*Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek Creek*

Tifa:  OH BARRET!!!!!!!!!!!!

Barret:  OH YEAH!!!!

THE END!!!